This time it's personal: Archive

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Aunty Jharna....

There’s this boy I like but I don’t know if he likes me back. OMG WHAT DO I DO????? Also I have this yeasty discharge… Dear Rosetta Lake. In my experience when you like someone who doesn’t like you back, try taking your hair out of your scrunchy and whip those spectacles off your face. You will instantly become exactly what any hot blooded man desires. Or, do you know his email?...

Jan 23rd

53 Questions That You May Not Have Seen Before

Instructions: You should know these by now.
What do you put on hotdogs? ketchup
Do you say "anticlimatic" or "anticlimactic"? anticlimactic because the other one is incorrect according to my interwebs dick
Do you check flyers before grocery shopping? nope.
Blue, black, or some other colour pen ink? blue
Do you use your parking brake? never
Look to your left. How many framed pictures are on the wall? none 
Do you know how to play chess? Only ever played against my computer and no. Like minesweeper
How often do you clean the interior of your car? NEVER. exterior only. 
Do you ever read the last few pages first? only if its twilight saga style writing. 
Ever fallen in the shower? every day of my life, I like to apply it to my life. 
On a scale of 1-10, how likely are you to swear at other drivers? on a scale on 1 to chris brown  how angry am I?
What's the worst thing you've ever called someone you care about? I only ever say bad things about people I love    and hate
Do you have a Snuggie? nope
Are you allergic to anything? festival films
Do you have any TV shows on ? the office yo
How many times do you hit the snooze button before finally getting out of bed? I make it my duty to never leave my bed. 
Ever driven away in anger? theres only one thing I do with non blended drinks and thats drive. yes. 
What's your favourite freezie colour? freezie?
Are you a vegetarian? I try to never eat, because we all know those super models just look sooo great. Karen Carpenter took it too far but I think ive found a good balance. 
Do you have a garbage receptacle beside you? What's on top? I dont know what that is and I dont care to find out. 
Do you cross out your mistakes or erase/whiteout them? oh honey, everything has spell check now. 
Ever torn something up that you instantly knew was too important for such treatment? my birth  certificate
Do you think that things will get better? tv shows are good if they dont. 
Do you have an unpopular opinion? What is it? 'I dont care' would have to be my most unpopular 
What's your favourite quote? I dont think I stop quoting. Its Arrested Development comes to mind first though. 
Did you/are you going to go to prom? Never saw it.
What's the most physically painful thing you've ever experienced? Being High.
What's the most emotionally/mentally painful thing you've ever experienced? again being high.
Have you ever legitimately saved a person's life? TOO legit to quit.
What's your favourite book genre? Literature is for the big headed and overcompensated 
Did you like "Gigli"? Be honest. IMDbd that shit and I think not. Even the crap things I like have class. 
Have you ever walked out of a movie at the theatre? Hangover....still watch it to this day. 
Do you peek between your fingers during the scary scenes? always watch. turn off the music seems a lot less scary.
What was your reaction to Tatum getting killed whilst stuck in the pet door in Scream? scream have not seen it. 
Do dogs like you? BITCH. dogs love me. 
Would you say that you project an air of authority? people love me for my weakness and vulnerability 
Do people listen when you speak? No, but when I dance, people hear. 
How are your elbows? Are they okay? dont you ever tell me how to live my life. 
What is one thing that you do exceptionally well? Be honest. girls gone wild. 
Do you use torrents? proud parent 
When was the last time you paid for music? pretty recently, Atomic Kitten. 
Are you addicted to technology? Im addicted to love. 
Pick a person (you don't need to give their name). How do you feel about them? Be as honest as you can get yourself to be. do you want to sleep with him or be him? Both, thats normal isnt it?
Do you check your computer's dictionary for the definition of words you'd otherwise feel confident about using during in-person interactions? Just to be sure? Only in keyboard wars. 
How heavily to you rely on spellcheck and autocorrect? I was educated in Britain so never.
Have you ever gotten into an argument on the internet? Did you win? whats that saying about the special Olympics? 
Do you pause movies/TV shows if you have to go to the bathroom or the kitchen, or do you just let them keep playing? I keep everything playing through my whole life. 
If you use a regular alarm clock, do you have it set to music or that obnoxious beeping? Just so bored.
Peter Pan? Pedo Pan
How often do you fall up the stairs? Im a paraplegic 
Do you pronounce "anti" as ant-eye or ant-ee? (Example: "That scene was very anticlimactic.") 
Do you pronounce "via" as vee-uh or vie-uh? (Example: "We can get there via Tremont Street.")
How often do you forget to close your parentheses?
37am pretend you're on myspace again and relive question time.

Jan 16th

31,714 notes

The Love Calculator

Disclaimer: It’s not possible to get a hundred per cent probabilty, therefore there’s no guarantee of any kind that the relationship will work out between these two people. No record is being kept of any information entered by the user of this program. The creators of this program are in no way liable of any actions which might be taken by users of this program. Please note that this...

Jan 14th

1 note

did something truly mean and unforgivable on facebook. May lose friends. kinda worth it though??

Jan 11th

Jan 7th

1 note

Jan 7th

1,248 notes

Jan 3rd

55,012 notes

Dec 21st

Dec 7th

19,955 notes

Dec 7th

2,198 notes

Dec 7th

10,407 notes

I'm fucking Carrie Bradshaw

Being bed ridden with fever for days on end im left alone for 8 hours a day drifting in and out of sleep, better, worse, tv show after tv show, popsicle after popsicle. I have a terrible amount of time to think (wank). My thoughts are mostly of recent and my body squirms at how much regret I feel, the soothing is ready with its same words of ‘you’ve done things you’ve regreted...

Dec 7th

1 note

“I woke up this morning from this sexy, sex, sex dream where I was making love to...”

Nov 14th

“We’re all just repeating situations hoping for a better outcome and if we...”

Nov 6th

1 note

“For fucks sake, pull yourself together girl.”

Oct 30th

Oct 29th

I'm such a creeper

Now pull your waistband up like you expecting a flood and stick your hair down flat like it was covered in mud. Trim up your pencil mustache and pop them peepers. Put this in your speakers, you a certified creeper.

Oct 27th